iM

New Cars for the Week of March 19th, 2018

Karlmann King

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If you're shopping for a car right now, chances are you're looking at SUVs and crossovers, because that's pretty much the only kind of vehicle anyone wants anymore. If you happen to be filthy rich, not care about brand heritage, not care about performance and are shot at quite often, there's really good news! It's called the Karlmann King, and it's a Chinese-designed vehicle built in Europe, which flips the script on how most companies are making cars these days. It looks like an F-117 stealth fighter and is powered by a 6.8 litre V10 from the Ford F550. If you want the bulletproof model though, you're looking at a car weighing 13,227 pounds (for reference, cars generally weigh between 3 and 400 pounds), so obviously performance isn't great. How not great? Despite 400 horsepower, it'll only hit a top speed of 87 MPH. But since it's a car designed to be ridden in, not driven, because it has a coffee machine, flat screen TV, refrigerator, PlayStation 4 and various other pimp-my-ride-type accouterments, you probably won't care how slow you're going.

Mercedes-Maybach Pullman

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If you're filthy rich, do care about brand heritage, don't like driving and don't get shot at very often, there's also good news this week because the new Mercedes-Maybach Pullman S650 has been announced. Basically, this is the $615,000 limousine edition of the Mercedes Maybach S650, which means it seats six and features a glass partition between you and the driver so he can't hear you make fun of the poors like him, which should help avoid the development of simple resentment into a seething hatred, reducing the likelihood that you will be killed in a fit of rage by someone you hired to drive you around.

Volkswagen Touareg

In less fancy news, but still pretty fancy, Volkswagen unveiled their new Touareg in China this week. The premium SUV is hugely popular there, in Russia and in Europe, but sales fell off a cliff here in the states after Dieselgate. When it was removed from the market, VW officially claimed that it didn't make much sense for them to sell such a premium SUV since their brand is more of the people's car, but here they are again with a clone of the Porsche Cayenne (with which it was co-developed) but slightly cheaper. In truth, most of Volkswagen's cars have a very premium feel to them despite their relative inexpensiveness, which is welcome, especially as luxury cars are selling way more these days. And VW is sticking to what it knows and to cost efficiencies in keeping the Touareg a higher class vehicle than the Tiguan or Atlas. That said, we don't know if we'll get it here in the States yet, but the way SUV sales are going, they might as well try, even if it lacks a third row or hybrid option.

Cadillac CT6 V-Sport

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Back when we learned that Cadillac was trimming the CTS and ATS in favor of something in between called the CT6, I wasn't too surprised since sales of sedans are in the toilet, circling the drain. But I am a bit surprised to learn that Caddy isn't going to just phone it in on the new car, because they announced this week a V-Sport trim package that very much keeps alive the crazy fun factor of the ATS-V and CTS-V. Not only does the V-Sport have a 4.2 litre V8, it has two turbochargers, spooling up 550 horsepower and a tire-shredding 627 pound feet of torque. The turbos actually sit inside the crease of the 90-degree v-shape of the engine. For reference, most engines are 60-degree Vs, so it makes for a pretty compact package. No performance figures yet, but I'm willing to bet that, regardless of the 0-60 time, it'll be quick and loud enough to put a smile on your face.

Jeep Concepts Galore

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If you've been listening to my show for a while, you probably know that I'm not really into the muddin' or off-road scene that much. Not because I'm not interested, but rather that I've never really gotten the opportunity. My neighbors do it and love it, and I am a fan of old Wranglers and 4Runners, so I think I'd probably really enjoy it too. You know who else enjoys it? Fiat Chrysler, because Jeep makes a killing off of that scene and they absolutely know how to get to their buyers. This week is the annual Easter meet in Moab, Utah, where all the hardcore off-road types go, and Jeep is bringing seven concepts of different vehicles to the event. While most are Wrangler-based, there is a really neat resto-mod vintage-sytle Wagoneer as well as a really not-so-neat Renegade concept that basically just lifts the suspension an inch and a half. The Wrangler models all have their own brand of unique flavoring and showcase what a blank canvas Jeep's most iconic model is, and just how flexible the new JL platform can be for owners. Fiat Chrysler doesn't do much right, but it's clear that they really "get" Jeep, which is probably why they don't want to sell it even though it's the single most valuable brand in their stable.

VW ID R Pike's Peak

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Speaking of fun cars you can't buy, Volkswagen has one of those. It's the ID R Pike's Peak, which is an electric race car built specifically for, well, Pike's Peak. It'll compete in the hill climb on June 24th and is aiming to take Rhys Millen's record of 8 minutes 57 seconds and throw it out the window. We don't have any sort of performance figures or power specs, but it certainly looks like a super sleek race car, and if they're explicitly going after the electric vehicle record, you know it's going to be fast. And good for them ; the more interest they can build in electric vehicles, the more consumers will trust and consider the road-going models. Or at least that's the theory.

Toyota Corolla Hatchback

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Gone is Scion and with it their upper case-lower case naming convention, so the Toyota iM, has been redesigned and relaunched as the Corolla Hatchback. The changes are apparently welcome because the iM was a real piece of shit according to the reviews I've read. I drove an old Toyota Matrix up in Canada and really enjoyed it more than I thought I would, but that was probably 13 years ago, and I guess the iM hadn't really come very far since then, so the new Corolla Hatch features many changes. The chassis is more rigid, it's longer, wider and lower and out is the ancient 1.8 litre four-banger and in is a new 2.0 litre model. The interior has also been completely redesigned to have supportive seats and functional armrests, which was apparently a problem with the iM as well. Not to mention it really looks quite good, especially in a sort of light blue color in which it's been shown. I don't think it'll kick my GTI out of my garage just yet but I'm sure it'll be quite a capable, reliable little car.

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Authored by
Devlin Riggs