Last Week at The Quail

This week was Monterey Car Week and the Concours d’Elegance in California, where the weather is beautiful except for when it’s on fire, which part of it is, but fortunately not along the central coast where there were hundreds of immaculate cars showcased. I’m going to have to make it out there sometime, but since I haven’t, go check out Autoblog or any other number of sites with massive galleries of all the amazing old cars on display this week. One of which was the 1970 Ferrari 512S Modulo Concept which looks just about as close to a space ship as a car ever has. In addition to the classics, several automakers brought along some new cars or concepts which I thought deserved their own special feature this week.

First was Infiniti’s Prototype 10, which follows the more classically styled Prototype 9 that the company brought to Pebble Beach last year. This one is also a single seat racer in the style of 1950s-era race cars, but with Infiniti’s current styling language applied. Not only that, it’s apparently sat upon the new rigid, adaptable electric vehicle chassis that may underpin future Infiniti EVs, giving it much greater relevance than your run-of-the-mill concept. Of course this will never see production, and we don’t know exactly what drives it anyway, but man is it pretty to look at.

Another pretty silver single-seat electric racing vehicle showed off was the Mercedes-Benz EQ Silver Arrow, which, like the Infiniti, is a modern take on a classic race car. Unlike the Infiniti, it’s a modern take on a specific race car, the 80 year-old Silver Arrow, a Mercedes that set a public road speed record of 269 miles per hour in Germany way back in 1938. Also unlike the Infiniti, we have performance figures for the EQ Silver Arrow, which lays down 738 horsepower, 80 kilowatt-hour battery that gives the car a respectable range of 249 miles. But I doubt you’d get that far with instant torque and more than 700 horsepower on tap. While the Infiniti will never see the light of day through a dealership’s windows, the drivetrain in this car could very easily slot into an AMG performance car like in the EQ range. Sort of like a rival to the Porsche Taycan or forthcoming Tesla Roadster.

Audi was like Electric Vehicles? Oh ja, we do that too, so they brought out their PB 18 e-tron concept which, while having the worst name of the three electric concepts, also had the worst looking style. Not to say it’s bad, but the Peanut Butter 18 just didn’t quite reach the high bar set by the Infiniti and Mercedes. It’s not a single seat racer, but rather a shooting-brake style two seat wagon-y hatchback thing that still features Audi’s recent trend of the front of their cars being 100% grill despite the fact that electric cars do not need grills. It also beats the Infiniti by having a real powertrain, with a 95 kilowatt-hour battery powering three electric motors putting out a combined 671 horsepower and 612 pound-feet of torque, accelerating the car to sixty in just over two seconds. It’s apparently good for a range of 310 miles on a single charge. This thing looks like it’s straight out of Blade Runner of Minority Report. It’s very, very futuristic and I think we’re in for a very exciting time in car design if these new looks are actually implemented in future production cars.

It wasn’t all electric cars though, as Lamborghini, who haven’t found an electric motor violent enough to put in their cars yet, unveiled the Aventador Superveloce Jota or SVJ. While only 30 horsepower more powerful than the Aventador S, how much more power do you need than the SVJ’s 759 and 531 foot-pounds of torque. It comes from a no-doubt throaty 6.5-litre V12 and drives all four wheels, which also feature four-wheel steering, combining with active aerodynamics to make the car especially agile. Of course it has set a Nurburgring record at some time faster than other people that is totally meaningless. It’s lower, it’s stiffer, it has more downforce and it’s faster than the Aventador S, which means it will be absolute hell to drive around anywhere that isn’t an immaculate race track, but I’m sure that isn’t going to stop some pharma bro or tech entrepreneur from trying. After all, they can afford the chiropractic work this car would create the need for.

Not to be outdone, Ferrari brought along a new car, or rather, a convertible version of a car we’ve previously seen, the 488 Pista. It’s the same as the coupe, with a twin-turbo 3.9-litre V8 engine churning out 711 horsepower and 568 foot-pounds of torque. But with the top down, the car is 0.4 seconds slower to 124 miles per hour than the coupe, taking a whole eight seconds, which I know will probably be a deal breaker for so many people.

On the more affordable end of the spectrum, the new BMW Z4 M40i was unveiled with a sharp “frozen orange metallic” paint job and it’s quite a dashing looking vehicle. Of course we’ve seen virtually every part of this car by now, so the complete package isn’t really a surprise, but what will be a surprise are performance figures, because they have embargoed those until September 2018, which is obnoxious. It’s apparently quick though, getting to sixty in less than four seconds, so draw your own conclusions about the car and its Toyota Supra sibling from there.

Back to the extreme end of the spectrum, Shelby Supercar, one time makers of the fastest car in the world, surprised everyone by bringing a new car to Pebble Beach this year. Called the Tuatara, SSC has worked with Nelson Racing Engines to build a 5.9-litre flat-plane crank twin-turbo V8 flex fuel engine, and this is where it gets a little special. If you run this car on E85 gasoline, it will make 1,750 horsepower. If you only have access to 91-octane dino juice, it will “only” make 1,350 horsepower. While we have no idea how fast it will actually go when those ponies kick in, it does apparently have a super low drag coefficient of just 0.279, which slightly worries me that it doesn’t have enough downforce, which you might want when your car is approaching 2,000 horsepower. The car is not desperately pretty and it is painted in a sort of matte primer color, but the point of this car is that number. The reason you would buy one of the 100 they are supposedly going to make, and have been saying they are going to make for seven years now, is that number. And the reason the police report will cite when it finds your body in three different locations in two different counties will also be that number.

Finally debuting this week was the Bugatti Divo, for which we’ve been getting so many teasers, it just seemed like Bugatti wanted to whip a dead horse, and they whipped it real good. But for good reason, the Divo, based on the Chiron, is a beautiful car and was shown with very fetching teal color accents. It’s 77 pounds lighter than the Chiron, generates almost 200 more pounds of downforce and will touch 236 miles per hour if you have a place where doing that is possible. Instead of just raw speed, this car was built with cornering in mind and was named after French racing driver Albert Divo, who raced a Bugatti to two Targa Florio wins back in the 1920s. It’s much more attractive than the Chiron, which is saying something, and probably worth all of the $5.8 million it would take to buy one because it’s only going to appreciate in value. Oh and if you’re thinking of saving up for one, don’t bother because they’re all already sold because there are way too many rich people in the world and I’m not one of them.

Which brings us to the auctions. No Monterey Car Week is complete without a few ridiculous vehicle sales, and this year was no different. One of the special cars that went up for sale was a 1987 Porsche 959 Komfort, which is one of those “homologation specials” we talk about; basically a car that was produced in road-going form just so the company could make a race car version of it and dominate, which Porsche did in Group B racing. There were only 249,959 Komforts ever made, so this was always going to bring a lot of money. Unfortunately for the owner of this vehicle, the trailer carrying it disconnected from the car towing it and the 959 plowed straight into a tree, and the owner just decided to sell it that way. So yeah, there was a very, very totalled-looking Porsche 959 auctioned off, and you know how much it sold for? $467,500. Amazing. I’m sure the buyer has some plans for it that don’t include leaving the tree-shaped damage to the front end.

But the real star of the auctions was a 1962 Ferrari 250 GTO being sold by Greg Whitten, an early Microsoft employee who invested very, very wisely. Only 36 of this vehicle were ever made and this particular 250 GTO, one of four upgraded by Scaglietti and one of only seven to have a more aggressive coachbuilt body designed by Pininfarina, making it lower, wider and shorter than other 250s. So you can imagine that this sold for a bit more than the $467k the crashed Porsche fetched. And yeah, it did okay. $48.8 million worth of okay, making it the most expensive car ever to sell at auction. Amazingly, that’s not even the most expensive Ferrari 250 GTO ever sold, as last year, a 1963 model sold in a private sale for $70 million, with another one going in 2013 for $52 million. So it just goes to show, you can get a better deal at an auto auction. You just may have to widen your definition of “deal.”

Authored by
Devlin Riggs

Headlines for the Week of August 13, 2018

Faraday Future Still a Thing, Promises Millions of Cars

Tesla isn’t the only electric car company in the news recently - you guys remember Faraday Future? The company behind the FF91, an apparent Model S killer that wouldn’t launch with less than an exorbitant 1,000 horsepower? Yeah, they’re still around. As a refresher, this is an American company funded by the guy behind China’s Netflix equivalent, but which recently had a 45% stake in it bought by Evergrande Health Industry Group because electric cars and healthcare are such a perfect fit or something. Well go figure, the American company isn’t very American anymore, as the firm announced the headquarters has been moved to China, where five R&D and production facilities will be built over the next decade. They’re promising an annual production capacity of 5,000,000 vehicles within ten years across both entry-level and premium segments to be shipped across the world. This, from a company that has yet to show a single finished example of their first car. Meanwhile Tesla, which makes real cars, is settling in at a tenth of that production capacity. So sure, 5,000,000. Right.

Germany to Force Diesel Fixes for VW Owners

While most Volkswagen diesel owners are probably decent human beings who reluctantly handed over their cheating cars for the good of humanity since they did really increase cancer risks, there are apparently a bunch of Germans who couldn’t really care about the state of your lungs, and who have kept their cheating diesel cars long after the fix has been available for their cars. Germany is going to start exercising some tough love with these jerks though, effectively giving them automotive time-out by refusing to renew registrations for vehicles that have not had their cheating software fixed. The German motor vehicle authority says only about five percent of Volkswagen TDIs have not been fixed, but it’s still enough that those drivers aren’t going to be able to fly under the radar anymore. I think it’s totally fair to say, “I’ve been too busy to take care of something,” but in two years, everyone has had some free time. Unless you’re Elon Musk, I guess.

South Korea Banning BMWs for Flambéing Themselves

Photo by BBC News

While the German government cracks down on some German cars, the South Korean government is cracking down on also some German cars. Namely BMWs because apparently 28 new Bimmers have caught fire in the country in the first half of this year which yes, seems like a lot. But the country is using this as an excuse to ban 20,000 BMWs from the roads until their engines have been fixed under a recall. BMW of South Korea is scrambling to issue a recall and organize a fix for about 106,000 diesel-powered cars including the 520d, which accounts for 20 of the fires alone. As of a couple of weeks ago, engineers still weren’t sure what was causing the problem, but the government’s action has lit a fire under them to identify and fix the issue. Yes, that was a pun.

VW’s Electrify America Promotes not VWs

Speaking of those cheating diesel Volkswagens though, VW has kicked off its Electric For All advertising campaign in the US, which is part of a $45 million public awareness campaign mandated by the settlement against the company for violating clean air rules. You might expect an ad paid for by Volkswagen to prominently feature Volkswagen vehicles, but instead the star here is a Chevy Bolt, with the next most prominent being a Hyundai Ionic. The Honda Clarity, BMW i3, Nissan Leaf are all also featured, as is, finally, the Volkswagen eGolf. The company says the ad is meant to be brand-neutral and seeks only to advance the public perception of electric vehicles, rather than of VW’s electric vehicles, which is very fair of them. That said, it’s rare for a company to be punished by effectively having to help sell other companies’ vehicles. 

Swedish Vehicles Vandalized by Incendiary Immigrants?

Photo by CNN

Meanwhile over in Sweden, the automotive market is also heating up, and by that I mean dozens of vehicles were set on fire this week by masked youths who were apparently unsatisfied with the heat of the Swedish summertime. The coordinated attacks on vehicles took place across several cities across the country, prompting a mature response from the Prime Minister, who asked, and I quote, “What the heck are you doing?” According to several outlets, the perpetrators are immigrants protesting recent anti-immigration rhetoric, which seems like a strange way to protest. Maybe they hadn’t heard the old saying “you catch more flies with honey than you do with Molotov cocktails hurled at motor vehicles belonging to private citizens who likely have nothing to do with vitriol being targeted at the influx of immigration to previously homogeneous cultures.” I dunno, maybe that one doesn’t translate to Swedish.

Subaru Replacing Recalled Ascents Outright

While South Korea forces BMW to recall 106,000 vehicles, Subaru is forcing themselves to recall just 293 2019 Ascent models because the robot in charge of welding the SUV’s B-pillar started hanging out with the wrong crowd, came in late, smelling of booze and weed and decided that doing a shitty job of welding a fairly important structural component wasn’t really required. Turns out, for safety, it absolutely is required, so the company is recalling fewer than 300 vehicles produced in an 8-day window in July when the robot was on its bender. Only nine of those cars had been sold, and instead of going without their car while the repairs are being made, customers are simply being handed the keys to a brand new vehicle instead. Subaru says that the welds were so critical and so deep within the car that repairing them didn’t make sense. This from a company that decided including 19 freaking cup holders in an 8-passenger car did make sense. 

Hertz 100th Birthday Makes a Great Vetteversary

While a hundred or so drivers in Sweden will be in need of rental cars for a while, they might want to check out Hertz, which is celebrating its 100th anniversary of being a company, which is legitimately an achievement. Who knew rental cars had been around since before the Dixie Flyer? In any case, while the poor Swedes don’t get this, we Americans will have the opportunity to rent one of a hundred Corvette Z06 models, which are painted in the company’s black and yellow colors and fitted with a bunch of obnoxious Hertz logos which really get in the way of convincing the cougars at the wineries that it is indeed your car. Who knows though, the 650 horsepower and same foot pounds of torque may even compel you to forego chasing tail for chasing down some twisty roads or stoplight drag races, but only for 75 miles, because thereafter, you’ll have to pay 75¢ per mile, as well as need to return it with a full tank of gas, which, with a supercharger, is going to go pretty quickly. You can find these in a number of major cities across the country for $199 per day without taxes or fees or the optional insurance or care package or navigation unit or pre-pay for gas or spare set of keys or whatever the hell they try to up-sell you with next. 

Formula E Racers Coming Up for Sale

While you may still be waiting a while for Elon Musk to personally deliver your Model 3, there’s an exciting new opportunity to buy some other electric vehicles that are a little more interesting and a lot less practical. Since Formula E will be debuting all-new cars when racing begins in December of this year, the old cars aren’t needed anymore, so the racing body will be selling off the 40 old model electric racers for prices roughly between $200,000 to $300,000. Yes, that’s a lot more than your $35,000 entry-level people’s electric car, but it is so incredibly much cooler to have an electric race car! But we all know these are going to be purchased by rich jackasses who probably won’t even drive them and will strip out the battery cells and mount them on the walls of their homes in Malibu, because apparently rich people have no taste, but really, really strong walls.

One week to @FIAWEC 6h of Silverstone!!! who’s coming for an awesome weekend? 17th-19th August See you all there!!!!!!! ✊️@Toyota_Hybrid #wec #silverstone6hrs pic.twitter.com/6riYZmYPIt

— Fernando Alonso (@alo_oficial) August 11, 2018

Fernando Alonso Retires

In other racing news, after 17 years behind the wheel, Fernando Alonso is retiring from Formula 1, which definitely totally did not have anything to do with him driving for McLaren who consistently fail to field reliable, competitive cars that frequently incur engine failure. Already this season, he’s splitting his time with the Toyota team at the World Endurance Championship, and speculation is rife that he will join IndyCar. He’s only 37 and has won the Formula 1 championship twice, being regarded one of the best F1 drivers in the history of the sport, so it’s sad to see him go, but it’d be like if Gordon Ramsay were forced by contract to work at Burger King. It’s just not going to last.

Porsche Sets Track Records with Panamera Hybrid

Long-time listeners and friends will know that my full-time job is in marketing, and I am no stranger to firing up the old hype machine or being able to put a positive spin on virtually anything, but there are some things even I will never understand. One of those is the unrelenting pursuit of race track lap records by cars that will never ever ever be driven on race tracks. Which brings us to Porsche, makers of many vehicles that are plenty capable of performing admirably on race tracks. They announced this week that they had set lap records at six FIA-certified racing circuits. The qualification here is that they set the records with the four-door Panamera Turbo S E-Hybrid, and that the records are all for the “fastest luxury four door hybrid sedan.” The obvious question here is who gives a shit, and I really honestly can’t figure it out. What buyers are out there cross-shopping the Panamera with the Mercedes-AMG GT53 four door or Tesla Model S or BMW 750 and are like, “well, the others were nice, but the Mercedes only held five track records for fastest hybrid four-door sedan, so I guess we should probably get the Porsche because that will be super relevant when we’re parking it at the fancy outlet mall or in the Starbucks drive-thru."

Bottoms-up Booze for Bimmers?

A few years ago, Anheuser-Busch debuted their bottoms-up beer service at Cardinals games, which I then tried because it was a fun novelty that the company said was meant to cut down on the head in beers and make for a more even pour. Sure, guys. Anyway, this concept - a magnet at the bottom of the glass that is popped up by a filler which then squirts the drink into the glass - has found its way into the automotive community via a patent application by BMW. Before you get any ideas that this is going to only make your Diet Coke addiction more accessible in your 335i, remember that BMW owns Rolls-Royce and that the patent specifically features champagne flutes in the drawings, so it’s definitely meant for the same types of people who are being driven around Santa Barbara by Jeeves while filthy hourly workers mount Formula E cars on their walls because they didn’t want to interact with “the help.” 

Authored by
Devlin Riggs

Headlines for the Week for June 18th, 2018

Flying Cars to Take Off in Ingolstadt

Long time listeners may remember a few months ago I mentioned Audi’s partnership with Airbus to start developing flying cars. As a refresher, these were very loosely termed cars. Basically it’s a three-part design, with a quadcopter, passenger pod and electric skateboard-like platform. The pod can be transported by either the quadcopter or wheeled platform, making it either flying or car, but not really “flying car.” I said at the time that the idea was pretty neat and more likely to succeed than any other system I’d seen and, sure enough, Audi has just received approval from the German government to start testing these in their headquarter city in Bavaria, Ingolstadt. Now, this is a long way from being like “oh my God, we are all going to be catching flying car taxis from the airports within five years,” but it’s a lot closer than I thought we’d see in my lifetime, so I’m hoping this actually goes somewhere. Onward and upward, Audi.

Volvo’s New US Plant feat. Dig @ Trump

In a time when automotive manufacturing jobs can be hard to come by in the US, who can we trust to bring back those jobs? Yep, the Chinese and Swedes! Volvo, which is owned by Chinese company Geely, formally opened their new factory in South Carolina, which will build the new S60 we’ll get to later. In addition to providing Volvo the chance to suck up to American buyers by focusing on the $1.1 billion investment in America and the 4,000 jobs the factory will host when construction is complete, the event gave Volvo execs the chance to cast some serious shade at Donald Trump and his supporters Nikki Haley and Governor Henry McMaster. Volvo CEO Hakan Samuelsson said “If you have trade barriers and restrictions, we cannot create as many jobs as we are planning to. We want to export and if suddenly China and Europe have very high barriers, it would be impossible. Then you have to build the cars there. And then all cars will be more expensive, you have to invest more tooling and have every model in every country. That’s against all the logic of modern economies that trade with each other.” It seems there’s a lot of commentary about our trade policy being against all logic, and yet here we are, threatening a 25% tariff on imported vehicles and auto parts. It’s almost like logic doesn’t factor into decisions at all, but what do I know, I’m only a master of business with a degree in political science who happens to like his cars cheap and fast.

Audi CEO Arrested, Thrown in Slammer

^Criminal

The fallout from the Dieselgate scandal continues still in Germany where this week Audi CEO Rupert Stadler was arrested based on concealment of evidence relating to the defeat devices on Volkswagen Auto Group vehicles. He’s actually remaining in custody because the prosecution thinks he’s a flight risk. Audi has had to scramble to name an interim CEO while their boss remains a jailbird, but this just continues to look bad. If the CEO of one of your major brands was aware of the effort to deceive authorities, former Volkswagen CEO Martin Winterkorn is probably shaking in his boots because you can bet he knew about it too. It’s a serious problem when a culture of corruption comes straight from the top, and you would’ve thought Volkswagen had learned its very expensive lesson, but by keeping Stadler as Audi CEO this long after the scandal came to light, maybe they need a couple more billion dollar settlements before the root out all the corrupt jerks. I’ll take my settlement in the form of a V10 R8, thank you.

Teslupdate #1,000,000,000

This will again not be the week when we have no Tesla news, because there was some wild shit going on with Elon Musk’s company this week. First, the not-so-wild: tesla completed the setup of a third production line over the weekend...in their parking lot. Yes, the new line is underneath temporary tents outside because the space is needed that badly to ramp up production to meet goals. Back when the factory was a combined General Motors and Toyota venture, they managed to crank out 8,200 cars per week from the inside of the place, so if Tesla needs to move outdoors just to reach 5,000, I think you can imagine how much more complicated those production lines must be and how much more space they take up.

Amazing work by Tesla team. Built entire new general assembly line in 3 weeks w minimal resources. Love u guys so much! Pic of 1st Model 3 dual motor performance coming off the line … pic.twitter.com/Xr55P3fmGd

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) June 16, 2018

Next came some serious shade thrown from General Motors. Actress Mary McCormack who you may remember from some sort of television shows somewhere, tweeted out a video of her husband’s Tesla Model S, which apparently just started catching fire while he was driving it and burst into flames in the middle of Santa Monica Boulevard. Tesla has no idea what happened or why, but GM jumped at the opportunity, offering the actress a free Chevy Bolt as a more dependable loaner car. Nicely done, GM communications guy Ray Wert.

Okay now we get to the crazy shit - on Sunday, Elon Musk sent out an email accusing a former employee of sabotage and intellectual property theft, as well as leaking sensitive information to third parties and the press. He followed that email up with another about someone potentially trying to sabotage a production line by starting a fire. Then on Tuesday Tesla filed a lawsuit against a former employee for allegedly having stolen confidential information and making false claims to the media. Then on Thursday, someone claiming to be a friend of Martin Tripp, the guy Tesla sued, called the Gigafactory to warn that Tripp was coming in to shoot up the place, causing a minor panic and for beefed up security until the county sheriff found there was no credibility to the threat. Then AFTER THAT, Tripp posted to Twitter an email exchange that he had with Musk about the lawsuit wherein they both called each other horrible human beings and generally behaved like children.

We’re not yet sure if the Sunday email and Tuesday lawsuit are connected, but if not, that means there are several people trying their darndest to mess up Elon’s life. And jeez, people if you like constant dramabombs being dropped, no need to watch daytime television, just follow Elon Musk on Twitter. This is ridiculous.

J.D. Power Initial Quality Honors Hyundai

The annual list of J.D. Power rankings for initial quality were released this week and, if you’ve been listening to this show and looking at their recent cars, you won’t be surprised to learn that Genesis, Kia and Hyundai are the top three brands. All of them being owned by Hyundai. Even Porsche comes in at just fourth spot and Ford in a somewhat unbelievable fifth. The trick is, the initial power rankings count the number of problems experienced per hundred vehicles in the first 90 days of ownership. If things are going wrong within 90 days, that’s generally not a great sign for future reliability, but certainly not a sign that cars with good initial quality will last longer, as may be the case with Ford. They also don’t measure the severity of problems, so a busted transmission is effectively the same weight as a windshield wiper motor squeaking, which is pretty misleading. Furthermore, as I’ve discussed before, automakers pay JD Power for the right to use their awards in marketing materials, so these sort of non-firsthand user reviews should be taken with a grain of salt. Nevertheless, Hyundai definitely deserves a look as they do make some pretty nice cars. Just, as with everything else, QUESTION EVERYTHING.

RC-6 Corvette

While I’ve never driven one, It’s my understanding that Corvettes are very fun cars to drive. But in the Netherlands, where people decided they’d rather have land where the sea was so they built a complex series of windmills to drive the sea back into the ocean, one man has gone and made his Corvette a bit more complex as well. Specifically, he modified his C6 Corvette to be remote controlled. We’ve seen full-sized R/C cars before, but doing so to a Corvette is an entirely different scale; one that cost about $4,000. It’s honestly really impressive that someone could pull this off, but I still think I’d rather be behind the wheel of that V8 rather than just puttering it around a parking lot. But that’s the Dutch for you - defying convention, and the ocean.

Authored by
Devlin Riggs

Header image: When your GTI is the least athletic member of your automotive family tree.

Why Can’t We Be Friends: Automotive Partnerships Pick Up

The automotive landscape is in a pretty significant state of flux right now, with sales down, tariffs up, and a trade war looming around the corner. But, driven by the ever-increasing pressure to generate value for their shareholders, automakers can’t just sit back, shrug and say, “hey, shit happens, guys.” So what we’re seeing is a dramatic uptick in the number of partnerships between automakers and investment by automakers in technology companies. The largest of these is undoubtedly Nissan-Renault-Mitsubishi partnership, heralded by Carlos Ghosn, which is an alliance, but not a single company like the Volkswagen Automotive Group, which holds Audi, Porsche, Bugatti, Skoda and others. Just by cooperating, Nissan-Renault-Mitsubishi saved a collective $6.6 billion last year alone. This is by sharing development costs of new platforms, technologies, parts, components and by their increased purchasing power, being able to buy more in bulk at a cheaper price. The alliance is basically like a membership to automotive Costco. There's been talk about this alliance becoming a merger, but Ghosn squashed those rumours this week.

And when someone says their alliance saved them almost $7 billion in a year, people start paying attention, specifically that same Volkswagen Automotive Group announced a strategic alliance this week with Ford. The details of the Memorandum of Understanding signed are pretty vague, but it sounds from the statements made like it’s an awful lot like Nissan-Renault-Mitsubishi, where they will share development costs and technology, apparently primarily for commercial vehicles. I’d say this is a win for both companies since Ford has been ahead in the hybrid game for a while and Volkswagen’s infotainment system is one of the best I’ve used in a long time, but how necessary those are for commercial vehicles is another question. I’ll go ahead and take credit for the partnership since my household has been a Ford-VW garage since February.

Volkswagen isn’t stopping with Ford though. Through their Audi brand, they are partnering with Hyundai to co-develop fuel cell vehicles. Audi has apparently been tasked with developing fuel cells for the rest of the Volkswagen Automotive Group while VW works on battery cars. Audi will start working with Hyundai’s ix35 fuel cell SUV and the forthcoming Nexo and leverage collective R&D to take their fuel cell tech to the next level. The next level, of course, being a level at which someone might want to purchase a fuel cell vehicle, which I think is probably more a matter of fueling infrastructure than car quality or availability at this point. Regardless, the partnership should save both companies a lot.

But speaking of Volkswagen running the battery game, they announced this week that they have increased their stake in QuantumScape Corporation, forming a joint venture for the purpose of producing viable solid state batteries. The goal here is to put them in production vehicles by 2025. If that sounds familiar, it’s because Toyota is doing pretty much the same thing, but on their own. Future partnership incoming? As a refresher, solid state batteries, basically pack more power and energy storage capacity into smaller packages. They said that a solid state battery could increase the range of VW’s E-Golf from its current 186 miles on lithium ion batteries to a whopping 466 miles, which would beat basically every other car out there right now. Hell, that’s more range than my GTI gets on premium gas. I may be looking at the Golf GTE come 2026 or so!

Also in the Volkswagen Automotive Group, Porsche has bought a minority stake in Rimac, makers of two electric super car models, one of which was crashed by Richard Hammond on a hill climb attempt last year. As is the case with most partnerships entered into voluntarily, both companies stand to benefit, with Porsche tapping into Rimac’s experience with electric super cars for their upcoming Taycan and future electric cars, and Rimac getting access to Porsche’s suppliers and potentially greater savings on parts from increased purchasing power.

And you know what stands out to me about these partnerships? They’re all international. Every single one. To me they show the great potential for progress when companies work together, share technology and help one another out, rather than operating in silos, shutting out the competition. The market is tough right now, and if companies are going to survive, they have to work together. And the result for us petrolheads? More choices, lower costs and better, more developed options. If only more people believed in tearing down walls, huh?

Authored by
Devlin Riggs

Headlines for the Week of May 28th, 2018

Tesla Hits Emergency Vehicle...Again

Let’s see if you’ve read this one before - A man’s driving his Tesla Model S and decides to relax a bit so he kicks on the Autopilot mode, which is working great, keeping him in the lines and evenly spaced between cars right up until the point where it runs him full speed into the back of an emergency vehicle. Oh, sounds familiar? It’s sort of becoming a thing, isn’t it? Except this time it wasn’t a firetruck, it was a Laguna Beach Police Explorer.

Photo by ABC News

The driver says autopilot was on, but we don’t know for sure yet if that was the case. What certainly is the case though, is that the driver was most definitely not fully attentive, which they are supposed to be when driving in autopilot mode because, guess what? People who are fully attentive will be driving, not letting the car do it.

It’s so widely accepted that people do not pay attention when the car is in autopilot mode that Shutterstock now has a stock video of a “sleeping” driver cruising along in a Tesla as it drives itself. This is about the time Elon Musk chirps up and howls at the media for covering another crash of his when there are millions of crashes every day. He’s not wrong here, especially since only minor injuries were sustained by the Model S’s driver in Laguna Beach. But it’s like when my mom let me have a rubber band gun when I was ten - I was given strict guidelines for how it could be used and then I went and shot my brother in the eye. I wasn’t aiming for his eye but hey, his eye got in the way of my shot. Shit happens. And guess what happened then? Yeah, my mom took away the rubber band gun. If people continue to demonstrate they cannot be trusted to use a technology the way it is designed to be used, then it’s either designed wrong or needs to be taken away until people behave. And yes, I realize this could be said about motor vehicles in general, but driving is a privilege and not a right, which the state can take away if you are truly and repeatedly bad at it! But given that Elon’s out there making my rubber band gun look lame with his flamethrowers and journalist credibility ratings services, I doubt he’ll have time to see the sense in my argument.

Tesla Gets Thumbs Up after Thumbs Very Down

After Consumer Reports knocked Tesla’s Model 3 for braking performance worse than a Ford F-150, Elon Musk first had a tantrum, then said everything could be fixed with an over-the-air firmware update, presumably to re-calibrate regenerative braking and increase the performance of the actual brakes on the vehicle. Less than a week later, out goes the update and in comes a big thumbs up from Consumer Reports, who have now bestowed their coveted “recommended” rating upon Tesla’s smallest car. I said last week that it would’ve been nice for the company to get it right the first time, but I’m probably being a little harsh, because almost no company gets their cars right the first time. Look at Ford, who has been making vehicles for a hundred years. They’ve recalled my wife’s Fusion three times now for different things. But with the Model 3, no recall is required. They just upload a fix, your car downloads it and boom, you’re good to go with better performance. It’s really honestly impressive that is even possible now, but as the owner of a phone that has been bricked by an over-the-air update, I can say it’s not a completely foolproof plan to avoid recalls. But good on Tesla for addressing a problem swiftly.

California Unveils Digital License Plates for Idiots

On the subject of California, the state unveiled new digital license plates this week, which are basically e-readers flipped on their sides that display your license number and have a GPS tracker, allowing big brother to see how often you drive past your ex’s house to see if someone new is staying over before you head back to your lonely apartment for a dinner of cheese and sadness. The plates can also display other messages, like advertisements while vehicles are parked, which is just exactly what the world needs more of. And they can be tracked if your car is stolen by a criminal stupid enough to not remove the license plate as the very first thing after actually stealing your car. They will be available for purchase through dealerships at a cost of $700, excluding installation costs and a $7 monthly subscription fee, while I’m not sure what you’re subscribing to other than the appearance of being a sucker. I could now go into how pointless and stupid this is, especially considering it goes on the most vulnerable part of your car in the event of fender benders, but I think you get the point already.

Weekend Motorsports Roundup

There was some racing going on this weekend, all over the place, starting with the Monaco Grand Prix in, well, Monaco. The famous city circuit is known for being tight and showcasing the technical skills of drivers rather than the flat-out speed of the cars and this year was no different. In fact, speed mattered so little that Daniel Ricciardo was able to win the race with a broken car down about 160 horsepower from Sebastian Vettel’s Ferrari behind him. In fact, every single driver who finished the race finished in the same position that they started after qualifying. So apart from pit stops, no real passing, which does not make for very compelling racing.

Speaking of uncompelling racing, the Indy 500 was also this weekend and it was won by Will Power, who managed to go around in circles faster than all the other drivers who went around in circles. Congratulations to fast circle man Will Power.

In more exciting racing news, the inaugural Americas Rallycross event took place this weekend in, um, not Americas. It’s taking the place of the Global Rallycross series that went belly up so it’s maybe not so surprising to see the cars racing at Silverstone in the UK. In any case, ex-German Touring Car racer Timo Scheider finished second in qualifying. Normally, second place finishers and qualifying laps aren’t notable except this one is because Timo finished it with his hood flipped up over his windshield. Stop and put it down? Ain’t nobody got time for that! Especially when every second counts and you’re going sideways so often you can just use your door windows to see where you’re going. And perhaps it’s because the course requires so much sideways driving that the winner of the actual event was Tanner Foust, former Top Gear US host who is incapable of driving in a straight line or swearing, and with whom I want to be good buddies. Congrats, Tanner!

Audi’s Bringing Cameras and Efficiency

What has been a key feature on concept cars for years may become a reality on the forthcoming Audi E-Tron. Whereas previously US law mandated that cars come equipped with side view mirrors, a revision to that regulation (we are in the age of deregulation, after all) will mean car companies can now use cameras and screens instead of glass. The advantage here is that wing mirrors generate drag that can cost electric vehicles as much as three whole miles of range, so by eliminating them, car companies can get better range out of their batteries and charge you thousands more for expensive cameras and screens instead of cheap mirrors and plastic housings. There aren’t many other advantages of cameras. Glass mirrors allow you a 3D stereoscopic view of what’s behind you, allowing for better depth perception, they don’t have screens that wash out in direct sunlight and they aren’t blinded by headlights when it’s dark. But progress, Audi will say, to which I respond, I’d rather sacrifice three miles of charge to be able to better see what’s on either side of me.

U.S. Production Update

Several companies announced new plans for U.S. production last week, some of which I’m sure a certain politician will use as evidence that his trade war threats and tariffs are paying off despite no credible evidence of a connection. First, Hyundai is investing $388 million towards building a new plant in Alabama where motors for the Sonata, Elantra and Santa Fe will be built. This of course means more jobs for hard working Americans, but at the same time, only fifty hard working Americans will be able to find new work there.

But Nissan is going the opposite direction, scaling back their North American production by 20 percent to adjust to falling profitability. Low demand has led to greater incentives and more fleet sales, which have decreased profitability for Japan’s second largest automaker. Fortunately, no employees are being let go at the two assembly plants in the US and three in Mexico, but I guess they’re going to be able to spend more time making sure all the bolts are tight on those Maximas and Rogues.

EVs Could Cost Governments Billions

Right now, many governments are investing in subsidies for electric vehicles and the infrastructure to support them, but that may not last too long because the same cars that governments want us to drive could end up costing billions in lost tax revenue. Right now, gas taxes are a huge source of funding for infrastructure support, but as EVs don’t use fuel, that revenue could dry up. The International Energy Agency estimates that, if 30 percent of new car and truck sales by 2030 are electric (which is hugely ambitious), governments worldwide could be missing $92 billion in tax revenue. Obviously that’s going to have to be made up somehow, whether through distance driven taxes or maybe via our electric bills. Otherwise those potholes and crumbling bridges will never be replaced.

Cars are Too Expensive

A new report by CNBC has revealed that the average monthly payment for a new vehicle is a whopping $523, in addition to the fact that loan terms extending as far as 96 months, or eight years, is becoming far more common. Average length is around 67 months, so somewhere in between five and six years, and the total amount borrowed for vehicles rests at around $31,500. All of these numbers represent unprecedented highs, which is a problem considering interest rates are increasing, averaging now 5.17 percent on new vehicle loans. It’s even more of a problem when you consider that, according to my buddy Chuck at the Federal Reserve, the average disposable personal income per capita is just $44,000, which equates to less than $3,700 per month. According to LendingTree, the average monthly Mortgage payment is around $1,100, meaning Americans are spending more than 43 percent of their income on just their car and their house. That may not sound like much, but as the price of goods and services like food and health care increase, consumers are less able to afford their lifestyles. Plus that disposable income number includes benefits and employer contributions to 401ks and pensions. If this sounds familiar, a similar thing happened in 2008 when housing prices were crazy high and we know how that all turned out. But it’s probably fine, guys. After all, 90-day delinquent loans only increased to 4.3 percent this past quarter and Bloomberg reports that people are prioritizing cell phone bills over their auto loans and credit cards, with PeerIQ CEO Ram Ahluwalia saying “the car is no longer a central asset.” But it’s fine.

Uber Pads Wallet, Prepares for IPO

Fresh off surprising Pittsburgh’s mayor with resuming autonomous vehicle testing in the city, Uber now wants to be the “Amazon for Transportation,” according to CEO Dara Khosrowshahi. Between its ride hailing service and UberEats, the company is doing pretty well financially and hopes to act as a platform for all sorts of transportation solutions, including public transit, ride sharing and even biking. It looks like others are buying this too, with Japan’s Softbank having taken a large ownership stake in the company. Softbank also announced this week that they’re investing $2.25 billion in GM Cruise, General Motors’ autonomous vehicle division, which may open up some doors for Uber to test with vehicles other than Volvo’s, and will allow GM to operate on Uber’s platform. But more than just some Japanese money, Uber wants our money as well and is on course for an initial public offering next year, where individuals with more hope than brains can spend their hard-earned money to purchase stock in a company that is still burning cash and doesn’t really have a solid path towards profitability, at least until its autonomous program cuts out all its human drivers. But Skynet doesn’t go live until 2047 in most Terminator timelines, so I think we’re good for a while if you want to get in on the ground floor.

Jaguar Land Rover Goes Muddin’ (Autonomously)

Jaguar Land Rover announced this week that they are developing a system called Cortex, a project that hopes to develop level 4 and 5 automation for off-road driving. Currently, autonomous systems rely on digital road mapping pretty extensively, so an off-road system would have to depend more on cameras evaluating the terrain ahead and adjusting the vehicle correspondingly. In theory, this will render the Cortex system more advanced and reliable than most other systems at adapting to unplanned changes in conditions. Head of the company’s connected and autonomous vehicle research program Chris Holmes said “It’s important that we develop our self-driving vehicles with the same capability and performance customers expect from all Jaguars and Land Rovers,” which I can appreciate. What I can’t appreciate is someone wanting to take their car off-road, but wanting the car to do the driving when you’re actually off-road. It’d be like designing a race car to drive itself, but with a race car driver as a passenger.

Duct Tape Fixes Everything

If you’ve been on YouTube, and I’ll assume you have, you probably know that there’s a video for how to fix virtually everything, and many of those fixes involve duct tape. Now there’s a video of how you can repair a flat tire with duct tape, except repair is really the right word, but rather “replace.” Some intrepid MacGyvers  who had a wheel without rubber decided to see what would happen if they wrapped the wheel in 20 rolls of duct tape and the results are, well, somewhat surprising in that the car definitely functioned afterwards. Granted, the non-sticky side offers virtually no grip, will tear under any torque and are utterly and completely unbalanced on the wheel, you can actually drive on a tire made of duct tape. That said, 20 rolls of duct tape cannot possibly be cheaper than a tire, so please leave this where it belongs – as a goofy stunt done by YouTube people.

Prius Greatly Improved with 8X the HorsePower

Photo by The Fast Lane Car

I’ve driven a Prius or two in my time and, not being the type of person who really appreciates driving in a super efficient sort of way, I can’t say I really appreciated the car. Now though, some nut jobs have gone and vastly improved the car by taking pretty much everything and throwing it out. The standard second generation Prius body of the vehicle in question now resides on a tube frame that also happens to house the motor from a Dodge Challenger Hellcat, which has been upped from its 707 horsepower to put down 800 at the wheels. Whereas the normal second generation Prius took about ten seconds to get to 60 miles per hour, this car now takes less than ten seconds to go an entire quarter mile and makes a divine sound while doing so. As for gas mileage? I’m gonna guess somewhere around 3 or 4, which does seem a bit thirsty when compared with the original.

Matt LeBlanc to Leave Top Gear

I’ve been catching up with the Grand Tour recently, which is a good show with some funny old guy that feels like an old couch – comfy, familiar, and a little stale. In comparison, Top Gear in the post-Chris Evans seasons feels fresh and interesting and fun and I find myself wishing for more episodes of it rather than the Grand Tour. One of the reasons it’s been so good is Matt LeBlanc, who unfortunately has announced that he will be leaving the show after next series because of time and travel constraints. I get it – he’s American and has to go to the UK for filming, which takes him away from family and friends for a considerable amount of time. In any case, Top Gear will continue on with Chris Harris, who is also excellent, and Rory Reid, who is a genuinely funny guy. But who will replace Joey? Chandler Bing?

Chrysler to Disappear with Fiat?

FiatChrysler CEO Sergio Marchionne will outline the next five year plan for the company’s car brands – a plan he will not oversee since this is his last year in charge of the company. In the last plan set forth in 2014 titled “Our Time Has Come,” Marchionne stated that Chrysler would have eight vehicles in its lineup by 2018, including two plug-in hybrids. As of last count, Chrysler has two cars, the Pacifica and the 300. I guess three if you count the Pacifica Hybrid as a separate vehicle, but still nowhere near eight total models. Gone is the weak 200 and the planned 100 compact sedan and various crossovers never appeared. FiatChrysler apparently got distracted with its brands that were actually doing well, namely Jeep, Ram and Ferrari, and didn’t really put any effort into either Fiat or Chrysler, both of which have crappy, unappealing lineups that are struggling to move cars amid poor reviews and a complete lack of buyer interest. How crappy you ask? Well the company has had to recall 4.8 million vehicles this week because their cruise control may not turn off, which seems like a pretty important thing to be able to turn off. Apparently braking still works to slow the car but people are idiots and may panic if their car doesn’t slow when they disengage cruise control.

Rumor now has it that Marchionne will announce tomorrow that Fiat will exit the U.S. market and Chrysler will exit the rest of the world, remaining for sale only in the U.S. My question is, why stop there? Chrysler has destroyed any sort of goodwill it had in buyers loyal to the brand by not coming out with anything new recently and the Pacifica could just be renamed the Dodge Grand Caravan, and that’s really only because Waymo just ordered 62,000 Pacificas for its autonomous fleet. Kill off the ancient 300 and you have nothing left to keep the Chrysler brand going. I’ll follow up on this next week when we hear more, but it’s probably not going to be too surprising if, just like Plymouth and most of Ford, we say goodbye to Chrysler.

Porsche Calls Car Collectors Immoral

Porsche Klassik magazine published an article recently addressing the issue of investors buying classic Porsches in order to profit from their appreciation rather than to drive them. The author called out such buyers for “spoiling the market” and “causing an explosion in prices even for ‘normal’ Porsche vehicles.” This is largely true, with prices for even basic air-cooled 993 models skyrocketing due to the desire of people to just buy and sit on cars until someone wants to pay them more for it than they paid. I appreciate good design and vehicular beauty and I think that some cars, sports cars especially, could be considered works of art, so in that sense, I appreciate why one might want to preserve such art. But like good artwork, great cars should be appreciated. You appreciate art by studying it and appreciating its form, and you appreciate cars by driving them.  The article goes on to say “the speculation in which many dealers are currently indulging is heading towards the downright immoral,” and I have a hard time disagreeing. But as baby boomers pass on and the generation saddled with $1.4 trillion in student loan debt comes up, these prices will fall back down. They have to, because otherwise the market for them won’t exist.

Authored by
Devlin Riggs

Headlines for the week of February 12th, 2018

No Longer Saved By Zero

Nowadays, Chevy and Buick are at the top of my list when it comes to the absolute worst car commercials on television. Between the just genuinely terrible, staged, fake, “Real People” ads and the awful techno Buick surprise ads, it’s hard to think it was ever worse. And yet, Toyota tried their best to rob us of our sanity in 2008 with their “Saved by Zero” campaign that featured music from the Fixx to promote their zero percent financing program in the Fall. Of course, 2008 was right as the housing bubble was bursting, so low rates became common, and they’re still around today, but they may not be around too much longer. With interest rates rising three times last year and slated to rise again this year, offering zero percent interest to buyers is getting more and more untenable because it comes at the cost of profit to the dealership. But it’s still around in many places to try to spur sales that have been sagging. So what’s happening is a situation where dealerships and automakers are trying to decide whether to try to keep selling more cars, or sell fewer cars at a higher profit. In any case, if you’re in the market for a new car and have great credit, now might be a good time to buy.

Vintage Restoration Business is Booming

For people more interested in used cars, it’s looking like manufacturers are hopping aboard the vintage car bandwagon to help their old vehicles stay on the road. Usually when cars are discontinued, parts continue to be made for a few years and then the molds for the pieces are all destroyed and effort goes into producing parts for newer cars. This makes it pretty tough if you have an old car you love and want to keep it on the road if parts keep breaking. You have to rely on third party manufacturers of dubious quality or get something custom made, which can be super expensive. Fortunately, the cost of custom making things keeps going down thanks to new technology like 3D printing. Porsche this week announced that they would use exactly that technology to start making replacement parts for the 959 and 356, among other old vehicles. They have started printing just eight parts that apparently go wrong a lot, but are open to expanding their range to include other pieces and you know they’re of good quality since they’re produced by the mothership.

Fiat Chrysler is getting into the vintage restoration business too, with their “Reloaded by Creators” initiative. Instead of manufacturing individual parts though, they’re taking in whole cars and rebuilding them from the ground up, then selling them to collectors. Aston Martin and Jaguar already have similar programs and while there may not be too many vintage Chryslers that warrant full restoration, there are plenty of old Alfa Romeos, Lancias and Fiat Abarths that are deserving of some factory TLC. Who knows, the Italians might have even learned a few things in the 40 years since most of these cars were produced but, based on current reliability ratings, I wouldn’t count on it.

UConnect, IBreak

I say that because those Italians are in the same company as Chrysler, a company that pushed out an over-the-air update to its UConnect infotainment system on Friday that sent many, many vehicles’ infotainment systems into an inescapable boot-loop that, for some, has yet to be resolved. Until it is, drivers can look forward to having no radio, no reverse camera and limited control over vehicle interior functions. Aren’t touchscreens and technology great!?

Porsche’s Mission E Possible

Over in Stuttgart, Porsche is making waves with news that their Mission E vehicle will charge its batteries in less than half the time that it takes a Tesla to charge, more closely mimicking the refueling time of gasoline cars. They’re taking the shade throwing to another level, calling their system “Turbo Charging” to one up Tesla’s Supercharging, in which I can only assume is the first stage of a one upsmanship battle that ends in all of us using Ultra-Extreme MegaCharging PowerVolt MaxWatt Stations. Porsche achieves the faster charge rate by doubling the output of chargers, up to 800 volts, which can’t just run through the same channels as 400 volt chargers. It requires a wholly different and more expensive infrastructure and a different structure to the batteries, meaning this tech would be exclusive to Porsche. This opens up a whole other conversation about charging technology standards. Already, there are four different standards of charging port; one endorsed by the German automakers and Ford, one for Tesla, one from the Japanese automakers and one for China, which has by far the biggest lead in developing an EV infrastructure. What this likely means is that we’re going to wind up having to carry around a trunk full of adapters or that recharging stations will need to provide different plugs to suit different vehicles. Unless politicians want to get involved and try to pick one, but that would require regulations, and who needs those, right!?

Drowsy Driving Debate

Depending on who you ask, drowsy driving can be just as dangerous as drunk driving, or it could be just a minor thing that doesn’t have an appreciable impact on traffic safety. The National Highway Transportation Safety Administration is in the latter camp, with research indicating that only 2.5% of fatal crashes are the result of driving tired, but a new study from AAA indicates that up to 10.8% of crashes with moderate to severe damage could be caused by a lack of sleep. In their study, AAA put cameras in front of more than 3,500 drivers to track if crashes were the result of drowsy driving, which is how they wound up at almost 11%. The thing is, these drivers knew they were being watched and should have been incentivized to be on their best behavior, and yet still many drove tired and crashed. Plus AAA threw out any instances where they couldn’t see the faces of drivers more than 75% of the time, like if the driver was wearing sunglasses or if their hands were obscuring the camera, so the real numbers could be much higher than the data suggests.

On the heels of that study, Uber has rolled out a “feature” that limits drivers to a maximum of 12 hour shifts behind the wheel. The update will not permit drivers to accept new fares for six hours after working for 12 hours straight. Meanwhile, the Federal Motor Carrier Safety Administration mandates that all truckers carrying passengers work no more than ten straight hours and take at least 8 hours off between shifts. Not to mention it has stricter requirements for drivers to obtain licenses to transport passengers. I get that the current trend is to damn all regulations and let the free market reign supreme, but beyond a certain point, we have to accept that some regulations have been put in place for the safety of consumers and that they shouldn’t be overturned or ignored or loopholed simply because regulations are bad. Uber and Lyft and other ride sharing companies cut some red tape and provide people with jobs, which is great, and I wholeheartedly support the gig economy, but by consistently flaunting the rules applied to other sectors, they walk a risky path that could lead to even tighter regulations for everyone.

 Waymo vs. Uber Settles, We All Move On Unhappy

Speaking of Uber, news came out that they settled their lawsuit with Google’s self-driving company Waymo for a cool $245 million this week, which is sort of anti-climactic because we don’t get a real “winner” in the battle for self-driving supremacy, as a jury wasn’t able to weigh in on the situation. What we get instead is a muddled non-admission from Uber that they stole trade secrets and an acceptance from Waymo that what they stole wasn’t worth more than $245 million minus attorney’s fees. So as Uber’s apology tour for their various misdeeds continues, they can at least cross “stealing from our competitors” off the list.

 Magic Cool Bus

Every year, the battle is usually between the Honda Accord and Honda Civic for which is the most stolen car, and for good reason. Whenever you see either car, you probably think “there’s a reasonable sedan driven by someone who bought based on a rich history of automotive reliability,” not “there’s a thieving criminal trying to lay low until he can get this baby to the chop shop.” Just like when you see a school bus, you think “there’s a municipal vehicle on the way to or from picking up children to advance their education.” But when you see a school bus hauling ass down a residential road at 3 AM, maybe you start thinking something else, and that’s precisely what happened to a police officer in Trotwood, Ohio. After following the bus for a while, the officer tried pulling it over for a traffic violation, which initiated what few would call a very high speed chase, but a chase enough that police called it off because it was getting too dangerous. And they were right to because the bus crashed not long after on a home’s front lawn. There, police arrested a couple of guys who had been sleeping in the big, yellow, very conspicuous, very poor getaway car.

Ontario’s Rich Police

In other crime news, police in Ontario, Canada have purchased a Tesla Model X police cruiser, which has not gone over too well with taxpayers. The Model X starts at more than $100,000 Canadian and then had to be customized with light bars and the various other things that differentiate cop cars from normal vehicles, so it was likely a very expensive publicity stunt. Criminals, on the other hand, are probably thrilled since they just need to find a getaway car with a range greater than 300 miles. Even if they get caught, there’s no guarantee the finicky falcon doors on the Model X will work to put them in. It was, however, probably a better buy than a Model 3, because the department would still be waiting until 2019 to get it and even then the criminals might be able to escape through some of the car’s panel gaps.

Money Doesn’t Buy Brains

Photo by Fellsmere Police

As a man who drives for about two hours every day in traffic, I don’t need more reason to believe that most people shouldn’t be allowed to drive. And yet, nearly every week, there’s a story that chips away at my already weathered opinion of my fellow drivers. This week’s example comes from Florida, and is truly as insanely stupid as a story from Florida should be. A man driving a fifteen year-old BMW X5 SUV called 911 to report that he was speeding and that his gas pedal was stuck and he was unable to slow down from the 100 miles per hour he had somehow achieved. BMW, however, are calling bullshit on the whole thing because the X5 uses floor-mounted pedals so there’s no way the pedal could’ve gotten stuck by a floor mat or other obstruction. Furthermore, the X5 is drive-by-wire, meaning there’s no physical connection between the gas pedal and the throttle and that the car’s computer cuts all throttle whenever the brake pedal is pushed. I’ll connect the dots here for you because this means that the man never pressed the brake pedal when trying to slow his car down, which sounds an awful lot like he was not at all trying to slow the car down. The 911 operator even tried offering him some tips like shifting into neutral, turning the car off or gently applying the parking brake to bring the vehicle to a stop. All of these things were deemed ridiculous by the idiot man who claimed his car might spin out if he did any of them. So how’d they end up stopping him? Spike strips. Spike strips which he swerved to avoid the first time they tried. If you’re worried about spinning out your car, and spike strips and swerving seem like better options than shutting off your car, switching into neutral or applying your damn brake pedal, you should be banned from even riding in cars for the rest of your life. This man must be banished to walk. Welcome back to the caveman days buddy, you’ve earned it.

Authored by
Devlin Riggs

Headlines & New Cars for the week of January 22nd, 2018

Arbeit Macht Schwer

In case you thought the US was the only country with labor relations issue, here comes Germany to reassure us that we're not so different. Factory workers at Audi and Porsche plants have gone on strike to support demands of a six percent raise and the right to ask for a reduction in hours from 35 to just 28 so they can do things like care for children or the elderly for a couple of years, then return to work full time. In response to the union’s demands, employers have apparently offered a two percent raise, a one-time only “bonus” of two hundred Euro, and flat out refused to consider the reduced hours point. As they say, misery loves company, so I’m happy to see the rich American tradition of overwork and underpay is starting to catch on across the world. It makes me feel slightly less guilty for not working in France or Norway.

Geld Macht Spaß

Last year we covered the launch of the Porsche Passport Pilot Program, or as nobody calls it, Quadruple P. Well, they have some early numbers to report based on the program in Atlanta and signs are good for the brand, with 78% of participants having never owned a Porsche before. The company envisions this as just one way buyers can experience Porsche ownership, and they anticipate about 30% of buyers will purchase vehicles online in the next couple of years. Mercedes-Benz is thinking similarly, estimating that 25% of their new and used sales will come from the internet by 2025. But back to Porsche Passport - they also say it’s reaching a younger demographic, though they don’t specify how young. Given the fact that most of the participants are opting for the higher-cost, $3,000 per month service, I can’t believe these people are that young. To be able to basically have $36,000 to spend on a car every single year in addition to housing costs, food and other things, it seems like you’d have to be doing pretty damn well for yourself, which generally takes a few years. Or, in some of our cases, not at all. 

We Really Did Forget Dieselgate

After a disastrous 2015 and '16 where they were found to be using defeat devices to circumvent global emissions laws in their diesel cars, Volkswagen spent most of 2017 trying their absolute hardest to help buyers forget about dieselgate. A lot of this included generous discounts, goodwill campaigns and reinvestment in popular vehicles, not to mention the rebirth of the Microbus as the I.D. Buzz. Turns out, all that work paid off and buyers around the world pretty much did forget and stepped right back in line to snatch up new Volkswagens. What makes it more incredible is that, while the industry as a whole was down last year from 2016, Volkswagen recorded record sales, increasing 4.2% verses the year prior. And while the rest of the industry braces for more stagnating sales, VW sales chief Juergen Stackmann is optimistic, expecting sales to continue to rise in 2018. Based on the popularity of the gigantic Atlas, the compact Tiguan twins and the attractive Arteon, as well as the deal I was able to strike on a leftover 2017, it looks like their aggressive measures may be pretty effective!

Infiniti’s Shocking Moves

Meanwhile in Japan, Infiniti also had a great year, increasing sales eleven percent over 2016, but they’re still very much playing catch up to the German, English and Swedish luxury brands. Their plans to overtake their competition hinges primarily on electrification, as Nissan CEO Hiroto Saikawa explained this week. All new Infinitis launched after 2021 will be all-electric or will be range-extended hybrids, but not in the conventional sense. The company’s technology called ePower uses a gasoline motor to recharge the battery in its range extended hybrids, but that gas motor doesn’t drive the wheels at all. And there’s no plug-in feature. So the propulsion is entirely electric and the power generation entirely gas. It’s a weird setup, and especially considering Infiniti’s recently-announced variable compression engine, a strange change of approach to try to lure buyers. Then again, it could be a great solution for buyers without a garage or access to plug-in locations. 

Acura Wants to be Exciting Again

In addition to announcing the new 2019 RDX, Acura dropped a bombshell on the Detroit Auto Show, announcing the return of Type-S and A-Spec brands. For the uninitiated, Type-S is a high trim level applied to Acura models that are especially fast and good handling, and it was last used ten years ago on the TL sedan, but was famously applied to the RSX and Integra coupes, which were a ton of fun to drive. A-Spec is another trim level more focused on comfort, style and refinement than outright speed, so it’s somewhat less exciting, but no less important to buyers. The bombshell, however, was kind of a dud because they didn’t announce which models would get which trim levels or if they’d be bringing back an actually affordable fun car. It’s like Honda has this caged lunatic who wants fun cars and they let it out just a little bit at a time because if they let it off the leash completely, we’d end up with cars enthusiasts like and that’s just too much for them.

France Wants to be Less Exciting

People keep dying on French roads, with increases over the past three years after steady decreases going back as far as 1972. In response, France is lowering the speed limit on most of their highways by ten kilometers per hour, so the fastest you will be able to legally drive in France is just 56 miles per hour, rendering the fairly standard 0-60 calculations pretty useless. To their credit, the French don’t attribute all the deaths just to speed alone and have tightened regulations on cell phone use and drunk driving. This comes as road deaths are up also in Britain and the United States, illustrating a disturbing trend that I think must be attributed to cell phone usage. When I was hit a couple of weeks ago, I was lucky to come away uninjured and the other driver offered no excuse for why he ran a red light that had been red for at least seven seconds. Based on the Uber and Lyft stickers in his window though, I guessed that he was trying to find a fare. I wouldn’t go so far as to say those ride sharing companies are complicit in the wreck that has cost me days worth of time fighting with insurance companies and trying to find a new car, but the sooner we can integrate smart features into a car so drivers need look at their phones less, the better. 

BMW to Charge for Not Their Service

BMW, though, has a different idea of how to integrate phones into cars and that involves squeezing its drivers for every penny they can get, like little Bavarian weasels, hiding away all their nuts. But the truth is, the nuts aren’t even theirs! Or maybe the tree isn’t. This is a bad metaphor. BMW wants to charge a subscription fee for Apple’s CarPlay software, which they currently have as a $300 option when you buy a new car. By charging $80 per year after the first year, which is free, they argue that you pay less if you only keep the car a few years, which I guess most BMW owners do because they want to be seen driving a new BMW. The issue here is that more than 400 models of car come with Android Auto and almost as many come with Apple’s CarPlay, but it’s included in the price and not an option you have to add in later. Hell, you can buy a Toyota Corolla or VW Jetta and get these features for free, but you don’t with BMW. It’s like how fancy hotels make you pay for WiFi when you get it for free at Best Western. Why? Because the fancy hotels know you have the money to pay for it. Okay, that was a better metaphor.

Taking Crashes to New Heights

In Santa Ana, California this week, a driver managed to launch his Nissan Altima into the second story of a dental office, using a raised center media as a sweet ramp for the epic Dukes of Hazzard-style flying act. The driver, who was apparently high as a kite, was able to exit the car and hang by the door until police came and literally caught him. He and his two passengers were injured and taken to the hospital where they had some serious coming down to do. 

Photo by Southern Counties News

Tackling Terrible Truckers

From bad drivers to bad truckers, we’re headed back to England, where the Driver and Vehicle Standards Agency, or DVSA, announced the findings of a 4,000 vehicle roadside test. They found that one in 13 trucks on British roads were fitted with an emissions cheat device that give false emissions readings, allowing the truck better performance while drastically increasing pollution. If this sounds familiar, it should because it seems like there’s this type of story every week, it just usually involves auto manufacturers getting caught doing it, not truck drivers who are looking to skirt the law. A representative of the DVSA, Gareth Llewellyn said, “we’re committed to taking dangerous lorries off Britain’s roads. We won’t hesitate to take action against these drivers, operators and vehicles.” Unfortunately for Gareth, when trucks were found with defeat devices, drivers were given ten days to fix the problem or pay a £300 fine, which sounds an awful lot like they’re hesitating to take action to me.

Have a Seat

Back here in America, our love for three row SUVs has apparently created quite a criminal enterprise, because there have been a rash of robberies - of just the third row seats from SUVs. Apparently, on most General Motors SUVs, like the Chevy Suburban, Tahoe and GMC and Cadillac Siblings, if you’re able to pop open the rear glass on the lift gate, the alarm on the car doesn’t go off. Once inside, the third row can simply be unhooked and then passed out the open hatch. And who is buying all these third rows to make stealing them such a popular endeavor? If you guessed “people who have had their third rows stolen,” you’d be right. It’s tempting to victim blame here and say “just park in a garage or back in so the back glass isn’t so accessible,” but what’s the point of a car alarm if it’s not going to alarm you when someone is stealing something from it? Come on, GM, this is on you.

AI Coming Along Swimmingly

While Google and Amazon work to integrate their digital assistants into more and more new cars, Nissan is going a sort of different direction with their own artificial intelligence. Instead of a female voice, Nissan’s Xmotion Concept features a koi fish as a virtual assistant that swims across the myriad interior screens to provide drivers assistance with, well, driving, as well as entertainment and navigation. It’ll also connect with the driver’s smartphone to share information between it and the car. And in case you’re thinking this is some sort of anthropomorphized Admiral Ackbar-looking fish, no, it’s just a normal koi fish, and I think it’s neat and more companies should think outside the pond when coming up with virtual assistants.

SUV Free and Happy to Be

While Ferrari and Lamborghini rush to catch up with Bentley and Porsche on the super-expensive SUV craze, McLaren is pretty content just where they are, thank you very much. The company’s chief designer, Dan Parry-WIlliams, told Top Gear magazine this week that “I’m not the first person to point out that an SUV is neither particularly sporty or utilitarian. It’s not ‘everything for a reason’ unless the reason is to clutter up the streets.” He’s referring there to McLaren’s design motto, “everything for a reason,” and it’s refreshing to see a company stick to its credo. Meanwhile, at fellow British sports car company Lotus, whose mantra, handed down from founder Colin Chapman was “Simplify and add lightness,” they’ll soon be launching their own SUV that will neither be simple nor light, though that may be said of their buyers. 

The (Frozen) Vaporware Car

Photo by Simon Laprise

In Montreal this week, someone had a good time at the expense of some local police, who attempted to ticket a snow-covered vintage Toyota Celica Supra that was parked in a snow removal lane, blocking in other parked cars. Upon lifting the very real windshield wiper to place the ticket, the police officer discovered that the wiper arm wasn’t attached to anything because the entire car was simply a pile of snow molded into the shape of a Supra. The whole thing was the brainchild of a French Canadian artist named Simon Laprise, who found the windshield wiper on the street and placed it on the car for maximum confusion. As for the ticket issued? The citation read “You made our night, hahahahaha” or whatever the French word for laughter is.

New Cars

Jeep Grand Commander

Detroit might make a great place to launch a new Jeep, but that’s just what Jeep hasn't done this week, when images of a new three-row SUV leaked to the media. It seems every company is scrambling to get an SUV with three rows out there for all the families who insist that contorting yourself to wedge in between a door sill and the second row only to sit cross-legged on a tiny, barely-padded foldable bench seat is more dignified than just swallowing your pride and buying the mini-van you should be getting. And with regards to Jeep, they don’t currently have a third-row-capable SUV in their stable and haven’t since the mercy killing of the Commander in 2010. If you forgot the Jeep Commander existed, you’re not alone and you’re totally forgiven because it was horrible and ugly. But now we have had a look at the new Grand Commander, a seven seat SUV that is apparently a China-only vehicle. At least according to what we know about it right now. The new model borrows heavily from Jeep’s other products for styling, which is now a good thing and it looks pretty decent, so it’d be hard to believe Fiat Chrysler wouldn’t wise up and bring it over stateside at some point. Plus, starting at around $38,000, it’d fit right in with most of its contemporary competitors. Until we know if it’s coming here or not, I guess you’ll just have to buy the Honda Odyssey you should be getting anyway.

GM’s Autonomous Bolt

One of the biggest stories to come out of Detroit this week was General Motors’ launch of the all-autonomous Chevy Bolt. This is a big deal because GM is calling it the first pre-production car to be shown without a steering wheel or pedals, which I guess is accurate since we’ve definitely seen concepts without them before. While it’s ostensibly a major step forward in terms of the future of autonomous vehicles, indicating GM’s confidence that they have a car ready to go completely without human controls, it really doesn’t feel all that special. Just looking at the photos of the interior, which doesn’t have to cater to a driver anymore, it really just looks like they took the passenger’s side, went into Photoshop, copied, pasted and flipped it so the former driver’s side looks the same. That’s it. I mean, in a fully driverless car, you don’t even need a dashboard. Your displays can be anywhere, or everywhere! The seats could swivel or not even face forward, and yet here we are, with a Chevy Bolt where they just Control X’d the steering column and pedals. Congratulations GM on making the future of motoring so unappealing.
 
But thank god, Chevy wasn’t the only company exhibiting at this year’s North American International Auto Show. In fact, there were a ton of new vehicles. If you want to learn more, check out to my Auto Show Rap-Up from last week's podcast. 

Authored by
Devlin Riggs